Long-distance harassment

I am sitting in front the computer, locked in my office; I am working flat-out to meet a client deadline.

Too many apps are running at the same time, the computer is groaning, the old machine is distressed, I think I’m having some kind of a JavaScript, CSS, Fireworks breakdown. The phone rings…

I pick up the handset, there is a slight pause and then a crackle, a man speaks, there is an echo. A man with a Deli accent tells me that his name is Ken; he has called me with some good news. He asks me to confirm my name and telephone number; I tell him the information he has is correct.

Ken continues. He tells me that his computer has randomly chosen my name and that he delighted to tell me that I have won an all expenses paid European holiday, he stresses the word European.

As he speaks, I hear a clatter of background noise, hundreds of other telephone-workers chattering to other lucky customers. Ken tries his best to come across excited and enthusiastic, it does not work. I tell him I am not interested, he does not appear to listen… he continues to talk.

Ken is unaware of my JavaScript, CSS, Fireworks breakdown; he does not care about my predicament or my client’s deadline, I am rapidly running out of patience. I tell him once again that he is wasting his time. However, there is no stopping Ken, he is persistent; he continues with his long-distance harassment, his voice digitally transported to London across thousands of miles of Space.

I have had enough, I slowly place the receiver back into its cradle; his excited voice is still audible, talking not listening, however, he is now talking to himself. I cut Ken off, mid-sentence.

I look up at the computer screen, it has frozen; I decide its time for a cup of tea.

Posted: by Leeroy.

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